In my family if you say you will accomplish something by x-amount of time and are unable to do so it is only right to let the person know as soon as you realize you'll not be able to keep your word... if you don't, you are not only being inconsiderate but breaking trust with that person. If it happens over and over, how is that person supposed to trust you at all? I suppose there is always the 'trust' that you are not a reliable person and anything you say should never be held against you...
It just seems like a deceitful way to live. Am I wrong? Am I being too judgmental? How many times should I trust this person to do what they promise me they will do before I become the fool in the relationship?
My Aunt has a saying: fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me. With believers, is it the same thing? How many times do you turn the other cheek?
Sigh... I guess the worst part is when they say they are sorry and then in the same breath promise something that whenever I believe it I end up crying my eyes out because something came up and they not only didn't fulfill their promise but it passed by unnoticed yesterday and they have yet to say something to me about why they couldn't keep their word. Yet how can I not believe it? If I am loving them I should believe all things and hope all things, and Jesus told Peter HOW many times to forgive?? (that number seems a little high Lord...)
So maybe I am not having a hard time with lying, I am having a hard time with loving. Love is a difficult thing when people are unloveable... but I guess that word really doesn't exist because who, in the spectrum of grace, is unloveable?
Lord give me grace! And the strength of heart to know I might- and probably will- be hurt but even so to believe all things and hope all things! And when it comes right down to it, to just simply forgive and move on.
Amen.
4 comments:
I just lied last night and felt terrible for it. It was a stupid reflex reaction about an alarm status I thought I was wrong about while doing checks @ work. I confessed it as soon as I could to the guy who I'd lied to, and he didn't even care - but I've just felt nasty thinking that a lie was the first thing that came out of my mouth when I didn't want to look bad.
And I, like the person you're talking about, have a terrible record of being late for various appointments. I try not to give anybody timelines for anything anymore, because it got so bad but still there are times... Did I give you a timeline for the book cover? I tried not to.
But I'm wincing as I read your blog - 'cause the next to unloveable person and I have a lot in common. I've gotten a lot better about keeping my word with Brandy, but still there are times.
Lying is hard thing. Most of us will do as Judah pointed out and not think twice about it. Kudos to you, Judah, for being sensitive about it.
I'm sorry that someone has hurt you this way. My first thought was to check my heart to see if it was me. Which is probably a good thing to do.
It was neat to watch the transformation though of addressing the sin, to laying it out before God, and then in that miraculous way that the Holy Spirit is so good at, He gave you a heart like His for the situation. Perfect example of why prayer is a good thing.
It's funny you addressed this when you did because all day today I've been pouting about this very type of thing on a professional level - that's not to say I've become a professhional pouter, but rather that the guy who is supposed to be the go-between for your dad's new job and us has been totally useless other than the initial contact he made. He says he will do one thing and it never comes about. He says tomorrow and it's a week later...or in the case of our visa - not yet.
Many people are raised with the attitude that the world revolves around them and if you've got a problem with their timelines and when or whether or not they fulfill them, that's your issue.
Also, there was a time when a man's word meant something. Now, it's a rare thing for integrity to be valued on a personal level.
Ok, I'm rambling. Good blog, Beth.
I hope its not me!
I will remember this about you and hold fast to all appointments.
And...I also jump right into being angry and not wanting to trust people again. I love you lady and I hope can get through this and still have a smile!
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